When I was ten years old, on a cold January day, I suffered an asthma attack.

Looking back, I wonder what the real cause was.

On my page I tell you how I was treated like dirt in my family, right?

Do any of you realize that the lungs are part of the emotional proccess?

So the story continues....It was a Sunday and all the equipment my mom had, inhaler, a nebulizer for the home did not work.  I was rushed into the ER, oxygen mask and all.  I ended up staying at the hospital.  I would tell the full story, but this is a laptop and I'm bending over.

What a pain, perhaps it was almost a good way to kill myself.......I mean wasn't my time over?  No and No, the point was completely different.

For 10 years I believed I was dirt, I believed everything they said to me that I was.  Then I had a revelation.   I was surrounded by great leaders, people who had watched over me, angels, Jesus, Gandhi, you name it and I'd say yes.  They came to me one night that week and told me to let go.  Let go I did.  I freed myself from the putdown crap they fed me.   And I walked the path to understand that I was not alone, that there were far more people out there who really cared and knew me better than my family.  That includes Obi, JaBuddha, Ian and everyone else here.  You were all there.

So I wasn't filled to the brim with "dirty" emotions that made me weak at heart.  I was given a chance. 

Thank you all for helping me survive my childhood!

Here's my more evolutioned blog: http://shinedspace4all.blogspot.com/  you can't miss it, there's a lot more in there that I've cultivated over time.

He hunts like a lion
With its sharp jaw
Just not with the fur
And evil claws

He swims like a fish
With its strong flipper
Just not with the gills
And powerful fin

He flies like an eagle
With its tough wings
Just not with the feathers
And light weight

He runs like a cheetah
With its energitic legs
Just not with the fours
And sense of light

He gathers herbs like a rabbit
With its good nature
Just not with the quickness
And sensitive ears

He plays like two apes
With their tugging hearts
Just not with peace and joy
And all the excitement

He thinks like a dolphin
With its brilliant head
Just not slowly and well
And with the heart

He talks like a dog
With words and wisdom
Just not with gentleness
And protective judgment

He is a human
Built of animal flesh
And the power to strike
No matter the fact

He is an animal
With a brain to build
And hands to make the
World dissolve to pieces

Why was he given the
Choice of flesh or herb?
It strikes nature that
Man decided the world
Should be destroyed

Nevertheless nature thrives
Trying to win against its
Enemy: the two-footed animal
We call human

 

People talk about awareness all the time.  They want you to see what is happening to other people, even if they don't experience it firsthand.  These people are standing for those who cannot represent themselves in the world, all because the world is not paying attention.  I will not say that the world doesn't care because they do at a much deeper level.  Think of the time a stranger came to your door in the middle of winter with little to wear but a shirt and shorts.  You shared your celebration with him because you cared about his well being.  It is only once in a lifetime moments that we are reminded how much we really have to give.  Gifts come in different forms, shapes, and ways.  Giving love is one great thing you can do, even when you just kiss someone.  There is no such thing as a cheap gift all because you have forgotten that money cannot buy feelings.  That is how humans form relationships.  Our heart is the main source of what goes on in our life.  If you're feeling good being an alcoholic, your life will run that way.  You may experience things that you do not want to because you felt that way.  Would it help if I told you what I understand about the world?  Well, here's the list, remember I don't experience everything firsthand, I'm just not being ignorant.

          I am aware that:

                   Individually

• Most people are likely to fear something
• You are angry with yourself internally
• You think someone else should take the blame
• You believe the gray part of the world is very small
• You have a huge ego
• You do what you know you shouldn't do
• You are likely to shout for no reason